My Father

Just came back from office and had dinner. I am alone at my home. My wife and our son have gone for the holiday. And I am terribly missing my son. Even though he will be away from me for a couple of weeks, I am so used with him that, every second I miss him. Especially when I am alone at home. As a father, it’s a natural thing that you are missing your dear ones.

At the same time, I thought about my father. How he must be feeling when all of his children stay away from him? Wouldn’t he be feeling lonely?

About my father, If anybody asks me about who my role model is, its obviously my father. I would like to share a few things about him. Some of the things are quite personal, but I do not hesitate to share as he has already inspired hundreds of lives.

My father is a well educated farmer. He is now sixty years old. I have five elder sisters and a younger brother. He has spent his life in shaping up his children.

He is very good looking man. Very good physique, Fair skin, straight nose, eyes reflecting confidence. I am sure a lot of girls must have a crush on him in his younger days. J

During his school and college days, he was excellent in studies and sports. He wanted to study more and more, but my grand father had other plans. According to him, studying was a waste of time; instead he wanted my father to help him in his agriculture farm. He forced my father to stop the studies.

My father got married at the age of 19 and my mother was 18 years old then. These kind of things were happening in old India, as there was no law to avoid marriages at such a small age. In the next 2 years, my grand father and my uncle (Father’s younger brother) passed away in an accident.

My eldest sister was few months old then. Just imagine the situation. At the age of 21 he had a child; whole responsibility of home came on his shoulders. He had to take care of his ailing mother, a younger brother and a sister and my mother.

For next 10 years, he struggled for everything, sometimes even for food. He was working in his farm day and night. He did all possible experimentation in agriculture. He started to implement drip irrigation almost 30 years back. He started to take the crops like sugar cane, water melons, banana, rice, etc for the first time in the region.
He got lot of appreciation from people, experts and government also.

But whatever he experimented, he failed at least 75% of the time. But he never gave up and continued his quest for exploring new things. But still our financial situation was very delicate. We struggled for mere bread and rice. Sometimes we slept empty stomach.

But my dad kept all of us very happy, he taught us to dream big. He nurtured our belief system and taught us the importance of politeness, positivity and working hard.

During my childhood, there was no electricity connection at my home. I used to study under the light of a Kerosene lamp. I am 30 years old now, and for the first 15 years of my life, I could not even wear a Slipper. I used to go barefoot until my high school days were finished. I got first pair of foot wear, when I got admitted to college. But we never complained about it. My dad taught me to believe in my abilities and told me that it’s just a matter of time to turn the things around.

He was looking his unfulfilled dreams in us. He wanted us to take best possible education. I still remember, when I took admission for Bachelors, the yearly expense was around 60000 rupees. And my family’s annual income was 30000 rupees. (Half of my yearly expenses). But my dad told me to concentrate on studies and he will take care of everything else. One day, I expressed my wish for a computer, as I was a bit inclined towards softwares in spite of my Mechanical Engineering background. Within few days, my dad sent 35000 Rs to buy a computer.

He is very simple in his attire. A white shirt, white pyjama and Gandhi topi. Typical attire used by farmers in India. He never had more than two pairs of cloths. His philosophy is to use the cloths until it is worn out. But he is very rich in his principles, his thinking style, his way of tackling the problems, his views about current affairs.

He is the ocean of wisdom. He is a vivid reader. He has collection of more than thousands of books ranging from spirituality, autobiographies of great personalities, and innovations in agriculture to philosophical books. These books helped him to come out of his personal crisis.

I have never seen my dad criticising anybody or thinking bad about anyone. During his young days, he was active in politics. But most of the times he was used by other people for their purposes. My dad still used to forgive them and forget everything. One day I had a heated conversation with him regarding the people who used to misbehave with him. Dad smiled and calmly said “I am giving whatever I have, they are doing the same thing”.

Dad had few weaknesses as well. He was very angry in his behaviour and obsessive while doing the things. During my childhood, I had a fearful respect towards him. Anything I wanted to communicate to him was conveyed through my mother. But over the years, we could sense that he has changed a lot. Since last 10 years he has inclined towards spirituality, turned vegetarian and taking care of his health. He has become much calmer and fitter now. Rather he can easily defeat me in a wrestling macth.

Nowadays, I am quite settled and doing well in my life. My dad never appreciates me in my front. But his eyes reflect everything. It reflects a sense of pride, fulfilment and satisfaction. According to him, becoming a good human being is more important than becoming successful.

Whenever, I am confused or got up in some personal/professional problem, most of the time I visualize how dad would have tackled that problem. Sometimes, I ask him for the help, and he gives me best possible advice.

Since my childhood, I have leaned a few fundamental principles from my father. These are:

Believe in your abilities.
Never get disturbed because of obstacles.
God throws challenges to those who have the ability to overcome it
Follow your heart in case of confusion.
Take care of the things which are in our control and leave the rest to almighty. He will take care of us.
If you are good at others, you are best for yourself.
Innovate. Keep experimenting.
Build the habit of reading.
Be true to yourself. You cannot fool your soul.
Keep Dreaming

A final word to my dad, you are the best person met in my life. I will try to follow your way throughout my life. You have given so much more to me than I expected. Now it’s my turn to give back to you. Now, I proudly say that I have 3 children. First one is 60 years old (Father), second one is 59 years old (Mother) and third one is 2 years old. (My son)